Faith Crisis & Transition

Crisis of Faith

A crisis of faith can come out of nowhere, blindsiding you even if you thought you were content. Questioning religious beliefs that have been foundational to your life or upbringing can leave you feeling confused about who you really are and what this new perspective means for you, your relationships, and your future. It can be difficult to consider who you might be outside the context of your faith or church, and it can take time to get to know yourself again in this new and different space.

While in this place, it’s common to feel as though you must either continue to believe and participate as always or leave your religion completely—this misconception can often move us into a decision before we’ve had the time to consider what we really need. A Simple Modern therapist can help you process your faith journey and provide a space in which you can move toward what feels good to you, whether that’s distancing from your religion, getting closer to it, or remaining somewhere in between that feels uniquely “you.”

Mixed Faith Relationships

Belief is just one part of faith. For many, one of the aspects of their faith they value most is the community that comes along with it (including, oftentimes, family, friends, and romantic partners). This means that when your faith comes into question, your network of connection—your safety net—can feel like it’s on the chopping block too. But this definitely does not have to be the case!

If you and your partner are of the same faith, you might find yourself wondering whether or not you should confide in them about your doubts. You may be concerned about judgment, or whether your vocalizations could lead to a divorce or change in the relationship. You might similarly worry how your family will see you, or if your community will be disappointed, causing religious shame.

A faith crisis can be a very scary and isolating time, and uncertainty around sharing your feelings can make this internal conflict even more distressing. Unfortunately, doubt and fear often lead to pushing loved ones away, resulting in a self-fulfilling isolation. Opening up to a Simple Modern therapist about a potential faith transition, however, you’ll find that there is a way to hold space for your questions, doubts, and your relationships all at the same time.

Leaving a Church

Even if your church and/or faith no longer fit you, you may find yourself grieving when you’ve left them behind. Similar to any partnership, there are likely things about your faith that you loved, along with those that didn’t feel right—it’s perfectly healthy to feel compelled to grieve the end of this relationship, especially if you are suffering from religious trauma. Keep in mind that there are many stages of grief, and experiencing any of them—including anger, depression, denial—can affect how we show up in our relationships.

Continuing on with your partner or spouse after you’ve left your church and they’ve decided to stay can feel like a complicated space to navigate, but it is most certainly possible. Mixed-faith relationships succeed every day, so deciding to step away from your faith does not necessarily mean the end of a partnership. You will both need to work to realign your outlooks, and open, honest communication about your faith journey is the surest way to make that happen.

Having a therapist to help guide you through your feelings, insights, doubts, and hopes can make a world of difference in helping you and your partner to better understand and respect each other’s beliefs.

Because our practice is located in Salt Lake City, our therapists are uniquely familiar with the emotional difficulties that come with leaving a church, and in particular, dealing with the religious trauma or religious shame that can come from being an ex-Mormon or questioning-Mormon in Utah.

Opening up to one of our Simple Modern therapists is the first step toward becoming comfortable in your faith and in yourself once more.